About Adoptee Rage

Statistics Identify large populations of Adoptees in prisons, mental hospitals and committed suicide.
Fifty years of scientific studies on child adoption resulting in psychological harm to the child and
poor outcomes for a child's future.
Medical and psychological attempts to heal the broken bonds of adoption, promote reunions of biological parents and adult children. The other half of attempting to repair a severed Identity is counselling therapy to rebuild the self.

Thursday, January 26, 2017

Child Death Similarity Adopted Children Not Given Same Acknowledgment

Child Death Similarity
Adopted Child Not Given Similar Acknowledgment
The death of a baby is a violation of expectations. Most parents naturally assume that a healthy baby will be born, and if sick, the baby will survive. We believe that if "we do all the right things" during pregnancy, even in preparation for pregnancy, and after, a healthy baby is a guarantee.
The death of a baby is a profound loss that often others don't acknowledge or even realize. Attachment to a baby may begin before conception. Parents fantasize about the future with their child. The loss of the baby involves never getting to know the baby, the way that others know people. The hopes and dreams for the child have already been a part of your life. Not only is the baby lost, but so is the chance to see the child grow and become a vital part of the family. Some parents feel responsible for what happened. Some parents talk about a sense of failure, guilt and self doubt. Mothers tend to feel principally responsible. Some feel angry at their body's betrayal or guilty about what they did or didn't do. Some feel angry at other women who have healthy babies.
There is a loss of social support present with the death of a baby. Unfortunately friends and family often don't understand the depth of the loss. Death is not a popular topic and many avoid it at all cost. Most have no idea what to say to someone who has lost a parent or spouse, let alone a child. Often parents talk about their feelings of loneliness and isolation and feeling that they are the only ones who care.
Remember: People don't expect babies to die, so this is a violation of expectations.  Many people find death tough to talk about. Many don't recognize the depth of the loss of a baby. A lack of mourning rituals and a lack of family and friend support can make a parent feel desperately lonely with grief.  In spite of these issues, a parent can grieve and survive the death of their baby. Know that you are not alone.