The "FAKE" Mom and the "Real" Mom
The adoptive parent forum (adopting.com) a-parents go on and on about their hurt and anger at the honesty of a child's words, in being called a fake mom instead of their award winning adoptive mother.
Any type of parent parents a child to raise an individual, not to have their egos stroked by young children. Being a parent means that children hurt our feelings regularly, but the adult should be grown up enough to understand the whims of a young child.
To get your feelings hurt by a child is normal part of being a parent, and to separate this out of normal child rearing says that the parent has a problem with the adopted child's words of "fake mom" is pathetic.
In reality the "real mom" is the parent that supports the child unconditionally. The adoptive parents that try to counter the "fake mom" title with the selfish words that their mother loved them and abandoned them, or god gave you to me to parent is garbage to the child. Being an adopted child sucks! and it never gets better or goes away as you age. Regardless of how dedicated the adoptive parent was or is, the adopted child is stuck in a paradox of false expectations, the adoptive mother's chronic fears and the reality that we are not allowed to acknowledge.
Adoptive parents are fooling themselves if they expect perfection out of adopted children, as we can't provide it, no matter how hard we try, we will disappoint you every time. We are broken people from being taken away from all that we know, traumatized at birth separation is our very foundation in life and all that we know. We will try to attempt to play the game "the adopted child role" for your amusement, but later in life we hate ourselves for it, and detest that role deep within our soul. The adult adoptee hates the adopted child role he was forced to play for the adoptive parent, as the role is all the adoptive parent can see, when it is refused in adulthood, the adoptive parent thinks there is something wrong with the adult adoptee cuz they refuse to be the submissive, good or golden child played in the adopted child role.