The Similarity of Religion & Adoption Narrative
What the adoptive mother says, is how it is without question. The adoptive mother creates her own personal picture perfect narrative, any deviation from her narrative will rock or destroy her foundation. The adoptive mother is the "god" and governor of the adoption. She needs to believe in her beautiful perception of adoption, what she thinks and says, in order to maintain it. If anyone were to question the adoptive mother's rules, norms and values, with facts, statistics or the adopted child's perspective, she might begin to question the entire charade.
The extreme similarity between religious narrative and the adoption narrative:
#1. The story is concrete.
#2. No one may challenge or question the story.
#3. The story is maintained without change.
#4. Worship is dependent on belief of the story.
#5. The story can not change or grow with time.
The problem with religion and adoption narrative is that it is only absolute in belief to a young child that has not developed cognitive awareness. As a child grows into maturity, he begins to challenge the validity of the religious or adoption story with facts.
The young adult begins to notice inconsistencies within the story, the religious figure or adoptive parent says "just believe what you are told" or
"you need to just have faith without proof".
The adopted child believes what their adoptive parent tells them regarding their adoption narrative because they are not mentally mature. The you child has not developed cognitive ability, to question their parent about life or stories, the child believes their parent unconditionally, like an authority figure.
When adolescent child begins to develop an understanding of the world, they begin to question it, and realize that there is no absolutes. The adolescent time is therefore dreaded by the parent, as the child becomes able to utilize their reasoning skills. They begin to understand how the parent manipulates them and begins to use the parent's own skills on the parent. The adolescent child begins to comprehend the parent's limited cognitive skills, and realize their own capacity for understanding far exceeds their parent's abilities.
This realization of offspring maturity is why the parent tries to control the adolescent child, tries to dominate and fails because of the parent's pride. Instead the parent should embrace the emerging adult intellect and help the child focus on larger educational goals far beyond the mindset of master and servant fight for domestic dominance, religious control and adopted childhood passivity. If the parent did not expect and refuse to allow the adopted child to grow up, they should have adopted a human child.
The adoptive parent's domination will lead to future estrangement if freedom is not granted.