About Adoptee Rage

Statistics Identify large populations of Adoptees in prisons, mental hospitals and committed suicide.
Fifty years of scientific studies on child adoption resulting in psychological harm to the child and
poor outcomes for a child's future.
Medical and psychological attempts to heal the broken bonds of adoption, promote reunions of biological parents and adult children. The other half of attempting to repair a severed Identity is counselling therapy to rebuild the self.

Thursday, July 23, 2015

Paranoid Adoptive Mothers, Adopted Child's Intentional Mental Deterioration, Exploring Psychological Paranoia


The Adopted Child's Psychological Destruction
Caused By Paranoid Adoptive Mothers

Exploring Psychological Paranoia

Most adopting mothers are forced into the last option and second best alternative of infertility. As the cause and effect of infertility and the lifelong grief experiences from a child's deaths accompany the adoptive mother with the mental illness that follows the tragedy or lack of ability to raise your own offspring.

Child adoption can only satisfy the temporary demand for a baby, but does not heal the horror of lived experiences of the birth of a stillborn child, a child's untimely death or the inability to conceive and give birth. Adoption can only remedy a demand, but not heal the suffering, grief and mental anguish that lives on inside the mind and body of the deprived mother.

Psychological impairments and mental problems emerge from tragic life experiences, especially when the suffering mother refuses to obtain the proper type of psychological help or therapy that will properly give her the tools that allow her to deal with the tragedy or painful experiences.

Most adopting mothers refuse to address their own psychological problems, instead believing that adopting a child will remedy to her mental suffering.

What commonly occurs is the mother's false belief that the adopted child can cure her becomes a dismal failure for the adopted child's life. As a mentally compromised adoptive mother does more harm to the adopted child than good.

The adoptive mother smothers the adopted child with her own paranoid and fear based reasoning. The adopted child grows up to believe that this strained adopted relationship is a normal part of the adopted child's miserable life.

The adoptive mother teaches the adopted child all of her irrational fear, psychotic coping mechanisms and her chronic and obvious overreactions to simple and non complex situations.

The adopted child is mentally compromised from the start being intentionally severed and separated from family familiarity, ostracized and isolated into an adopted child's role to appease the psychotic whims of a mentally impaired paranoid adoptive mother,
Who's psychological well being continue deteriorating from her refusal of mental help and her denial.


What Causes Paranoia?

People with paranoia typically grew up in emotionally abusive situations. They were often overpowered and humiliated, which damaged their strength of will. Their caregivers were usually critical, unpredictable, and impossible to please. (220)
People with paranoia disorders often grew up in abusive homes where they were taught paranoia by example. Paranoid parents teach their children they can only trust their family. Hyper-anxious parents steer children into paranoia by unconsciously teaching their children feelings are dangerous and powerful. For example, when a child goes to their anxious parent with a problem, the parent exaggerates the importance by turning them away because hearing about their problem makes them even more nervous. Or the parent may respond dramatically to the problem by exaggerating the severity.
Often, children who grow up to be paranoid are the sin-eaters of the family. Everyone else projects their own despised characteristics onto them; the family members may, for example, gang up on one child and deride him or her as weak or cowardly. (220-221)

Underneath the Accusations

Paranoid thought processes are the mind’s defense against uncomfortable or unwanted desires and emotions. Sufferers struggle between two selves: one powerless and despised, the other grandiose and vindicated. “Cruelly, neither position affords any solace: a terror of abuse and contempt goes with the weak side of the polarity, whereas the strong side brings with it the inevitable side effect of psychological power, a crushing guilt.” (223)
Also, as many paranoid people suffered so much humiliation and subjugation, they often look for ways to build up their self-esteem by influencing others. Powerful people are ideal targets. Opportunities for vindication and triumph temporarily prop up the paranoid person with a sense of safety and righteousness. (224)
Consider the example of the Pharisees. They may not have spent their lives watching over their shoulders out of fear of a government plot, but they certainly pursued safety and righteousness through religious hierarchy. That is why they so fervently persecuted Jesus. The church leaders were terrified of the threat he posed to their power and luxury. They craved power, so they assumed Jesus did also, even though that was not the point of his earthy ministry. Although he was critical of church leadership, he did not make it his mission to dismantle it. Rather, he pointed people toward the security of a personal relationship with God.
Although they may project harmful perspectives onto others, paranoid people still long for relationships. “Even though they may be terrified by their own dependent needs and wracked with suspicion about the motives and intentions of those they care about, paranoid individuals are capable of deep attachment and protracted loyalty.” (223) McWilliams cites other researchers who say that underneath all this projection, the paranoid person feels emotionally isolated and longs for validation from others.
Like all personality disorders, paranoia is a spectrum. Sometimes it is as mild as people projecting their own experiences onto others. For example, a woman was discussing with her mother a disagreement she had with her husband. The mother could not help but project her own experiences in an abusive relationship onto her daughter, even though her daughter’s husband had never been violent. The mother fearfully urged her daughter not to upset her husband, lest he attack or abandon her.
Toward the psychotic end of the spectrum, projections become more grandiose and unrealistic. McWilliams cites the example of billionaire Howard Hughes who obsessed over the dangers of atomic testing in Nevada. While we now know exposure to radioactive substances can cause many health issues, knowledge during Hughes’ time was too rudimentary to give credence to his beliefs. “The eventual vindications of his point of view do not make his psychology less paranoid; the events of his later life speak for the extent to which his own projections were the source of his suffering.” (216)
Paranoid people often share common emotions: guilt, anxiety, lack of shame, and hostility.
  • Guilt – Paranoid people are terrified that, once others get to know them, they will be shocked by what an awful person they are. This is because they have been so often beaten down and humiliated.
  • “They are chronically warding off this humiliation, transforming any sense of culpability in the self into dangers that threaten from outside. They unconsciously expect to be found out, and they transform this fear into constant, exhausting efforts to discern the ‘real’ evil intent behind anyone else’s behavior toward them.” (She’s does not like me; he is out to get me) (218)
  • Shame – Sometimes paranoid people are so adept at denying and projecting their emotions that they no longer feel shame. They spend their time combating anyone they think might attempt to humiliate them. (217)
  • Aggression – Some researchers propose that many paranoid adults were aggressive, angry children who could not figure out how to process their feelings in a healthy way. Their caregivers may have struggled to deal with a challenging child, and their negative reactions reinforce the child’s perception that others are out to get them. (216)
  • Fear – One of their most overwhelming emotions. “Analysts have long referred to the kind of fear suffered by paranoid clients as ‘annihilation anxiety;’ that is, the terror of falling apart, being destroyed, disappearing from the earth.” (217)

Individual Christian Counseling for people struggling with Paranoia

Paranoia burdens everyone in the sufferer’s life. They try to defend themselves against their inner demons, but only succeed in making their environment more hostile and frightening. Their loved ones struggle to maintain a relationship with them in spite of hurtful accusations and erratic behavior. If you or a loved one suffers from paranoia, get in touch with a professional Christian counselor. They will use therapeutic techniques help the paranoid person understand why they react to life this way. The Christian counselor will also use the hope of the Gospel to speak peace and strength into a world of disorder.