About Adoptee Rage

Statistics Identify large populations of Adoptees in prisons, mental hospitals and committed suicide.
Fifty years of scientific studies on child adoption resulting in psychological harm to the child and
poor outcomes for a child's future.
Medical and psychological attempts to heal the broken bonds of adoption, promote reunions of biological parents and adult children. The other half of attempting to repair a severed Identity is counselling therapy to rebuild the self.

Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Adoptee's Biological Reunion, Getting to the truth through the lies

ADOPTEE RAGE!

Category: Adoptee Reunions

Adoptee's Piecing Together the Puzzles of Their Lives
Through Biological Relatives
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One mistake and misconception adoptees commonly make, is that they rely solely on their biological mothers recounting of her life story.

The adoptee's real mother is but a single piece of an enormous puzzle, that includes the real father, aunts, uncles, grandparents and siblings of both the maternal and paternal sides of each family. The old phrase about putting all your eggs in one basket applies especially here in adoption's Bermuda triangle where newborns, babies and children disappear without a trace.

The experience as an adoptee in my attempt at debriefing members of my biological family to uncover the truth that they have been hiding from  for most of their adult lives, takes great patients on the adoptee's part and years in recreating an accurate account of what went down.

Cognitive Dissonance theory is an excellent place to start learning your textbook psychological education, as this theory explains the psychological behavior, defense mechanisms and the personal compensating that takes place in the birth parent psychology.

When the adoptee attempts to uncover the truth of their beginnings, the witnesses are considered reliably unreliable, and it takes many connected family member's memories of that time to construct the rough outline for the story of the adopted child.

It has been my experience that my parents exaggerate, concoct and lie about vital facts to make themselves look so much better than they really are.
Yet to the adult adopted child it is "more lies" as the adopted child has been inoculated with lies their entire life and has no patients, only contempt for liars. We adoptees will catch the witnesses in too many lies, and some will give up as it feels as though we are talking to a three year old. The lies when uncovered by third party witnesses may seem monumental and are to the adoptee intolerance for liars....But we must be patient in our quest to get down through the fluff to the actual boring truth in life.

My mother's lies were equal or worse to my father's lies and it took the entire family to get to the truth in about four years...

Excellent article regarding non-reliable witness's.....
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LINK:www.scientificamerican.com/do_the_eyes_have_it/

Why Science Tells Us Not to Rely on Eyewitness Accounts

Eyewitness testimony is fickle and, all too often, shockingly inaccurate
IN 1984 KIRK BLOODSWORTH was convicted of the rape and murder of a nine-year-old girl and sentenced to the gas chamber—an outcome that rested largely on the testimony of five eyewitnesses. After Bloodsworth served nine years in prison, DNA testing proved him to be innocent. Such devastating mistakes by eyewitnesses are not rare, according to a report by the Innocence Project, an organization affiliated with the Benjamin N. Cardozo School of Law at Yeshiva University that uses DNA testing to exonerate those wrongfully convicted of crimes. Since the 1990s, when DNA testing was first introduced, Innocence Project researchers have reported that 73 percent of the 239 convictions overturned through DNA testing were based on eyewitness testimony. One third of these overturned cases rested on the testimony of two or more mistaken eyewitnesses. How could so many eyewitnesses be wrong?
Eyewitness identification typically involves selecting the alleged perpetrator from a police lineup, but it can also be based on police sketches and other methods. Soon after selecting a suspect, eyewitnesses are asked to make a formal statement confirming the ID and to try to recall any other details about events surrounding the crime. At the trial, which may be years later, eyewitnesses usually testify in court. Because individuals with certain psychological disorders, such as antisocial personality disorder and substance dependence, are at high risk for criminal involvement, they are also at heightened risk for false identifications by eyewitnesses.
Surveys show that most jurors place heavy weight on eyewitness testimony when deciding whether a suspect is guilty. But although eyewitness reports are sometimes accurate, jurors should not accept them uncritically because of the many factors that can bias such reports. For example, jurors tend to give more weight to the testimony of eyewitnesses who report that they are very sure about their identifications even though most studies indicate that highly confident eyewitnesses are generally only slightly more accurate—and sometimes no more so—than those who are less confident. In addition to educating jurors about the uncertainties surrounding eyewitness testimony, adhering to specific rules for the process of identifying suspects can make that testimony more accurate.