The Reaction of Judgement In Adoption Outcomes
The assumption that adoption reunion will bring closure, is the hope of adopting parents to have finality on their adopted child. That the closure will assure the adopted child that they are better off and the adoptive parents can say "I told you so" in their authority.
Yet in reality, the devastation that began on that day "the birthday"
when the surrendered-relinquished-adopted child was torn away from his own people and his own world, the only place where he comes from and where he has always belonged. where this biological child is within his destined place in his ancestral lineage when we look at the entire picture from where he comes from. These two entire and extended families,
eighty plus people that the child is descended from by which the infant is torn away.
On this tragic day, a child's birthday
was the day that the cancerous devastation began to grow within the two biological families that killed of one of it's own from everyone forever. Like a death but worse, to live as a suffering leper, on an uninhabitable planet...the new world of the adoptive family.
In that the negative impact from the adoption and it's devastating effects on the families that lost their newest joy, to be used, to live as a subservient, an alien and second class citizen to serve the adopting parents not as their own.
The child will be their puppet, to entertain them and make them happy, as the adopted child's role is not to grow up and become an independent person or go off to college seeking a degree or a profession. The child is the family's alien, born with all the intellect he will ever need.. to be their forever child and to satisfy their greed.
The families that are left behind, will suffer the child's absence, their hearts filled with despair, guilt and sadness. They will go on with life and pretend to be alright, they will drink away their nagging pain and hope death will come calling to relieve their disdain.
The hearts are forever broken now that the child is gone, the living lives from brokenness are reminded every dawn. When or if we reunite, we must have some empathy left to bear, the painful suffering from our broken self's that is far beyond repair.