The Forced Assimilation of Adopted Children
In the United States, adopting parents believe they are "saving children" through forced assimilation into their adoptive family, adoptive community, adoptive religion and adoptive culture. Although in the United States the pervasive philosophy is seen as "superior" to other countries and cultures, our behavior based in the consumer society within the materialistic culture.
The adopting parent's Christian persona is of the Christ's "savior" ideology that saving children from their own lives, is detestable in the eyes of the adopted child and adult adoptee, that spend their lives trying to regain what was lost by being saved from themselves.
The American arrogance in the selfish individual that believes they can initiate changes that turn people's lives inside out, erase the adopted child's identity and replace the adopted child's identity with the identity that the adoptive parents find more suitable is rooted in cognitive dissonance. The arrogant assumption that the adoptive parent's voice is to speak for and on the behalf of the voiceless adopted child is nothing more than self interest arrogance in the actions of the self-motivated adopting parent who's actions are pure motivations in self desire, self pleasure and self satisfaction. The adopted child is a mere pawn an source of the adopting parent's narcissistic supply for their own perception of personal happiness. The adopted child is silenced as not to tip the delicate balance of the adopting parent's self delusions.
The adult adoptee is the useless bi-product of the adopted childhood that was used and discarded depending on the tolerance and intolerance states of adopting parents.
The problem exists where the adopted child is no longer the pre cognitive innocent child that grows up and has their own perceptions and lack of tolerance for their adopted child role. The adopted child no longer can accept the false adopted identity and seeks to form a true identity based on the secrets that have been kept out of the adopted child's reach.
When the adopted child persona is discarded for a mature, truth based identity the role playing is no longer tolerable and becomes detestable and repulsive to the adult adoptee, the adult adoptee would rather have no identity than the adoptive identity that was forced upon them in childhood.
The adopted child role can only exist as long as the adopted child is willing to pretend to be the adopted child.