The Adopted Childs Burden,Guilt, and Denial of Truth
What Happens to the Unwanted Baby
To an adopted child, the sad truth in being an unwanted baby, is to the adopted child a
The horrible truth....But"Truth" that others deny us.
#1."you were not wanted by your biological mother"
#2."She did not want to mother you" and
#3. "She chose Not to Mother You by abandonment"
At the birth of an unwanted baby, the biological mother trusted strangers to take her child off her hands., Our life was handed over to unknown or first name basis, administrative personnel, that had no intention of child caring, only to take us somewhere else.
The administrative personnel took the unwanted newborn baby to the institution of foster care where we became the property, Ward of the State, and the states social service institution's newest financial burden. There we are cataloged, photographed and marketed to anyone that is in the market for a human child. The social service organizations create marketing campaigns to drum up business and recruit potential adoptive parents. Laws are created to streamline the adoption process, erase our identities and sever any potential ties such as biological fathers, grandparents and biological families or any potential relatives that may step forward if they had known about our birth and object to our adoptions. The paper trail of our existence is stamped confidential and all files by court actions are closed and concealed from ourselves and all potential biological family or or future welfare check access.
We are shifted from foster family to care facilities to avoid the potential child attachment to caregivers. When finally we are adopted and the duration of each adoption placement is considered a successful adoption outcome. When the adoptive parents grow distressed and send us back, the records are sealed and we are simply put back into the system to be re-adopted and re-fostered. There is no paper trail of our entire journey, just to the point of the last placement and re-enter the foster care system. If our biological family wanted to find us it is impossible, as all of our records are closed. We float between the hopes and disappointments of the adults who temporarily employ us in their care until we reach the age of majority 18 years old. We are now adults and expected to become contributing members of society,
without the psychological or developmental tools to live productive lives.