Acknowledging the Unresolved Childhood Injustice
The adult adoptee's intentional avoidance of the adopted childhood is a common defense mechanism that will spare the present-self from psychologically crippling history of pain, humiliation and injustice. To pretend that one's own childhood does not exist, pretend to have no memories of childhood or to be careful enough to control current thoughts in such a way to avoid history's pain from yesterday always effects today's impression to the present.
The acknowledgment of reality and truth in the adopted child's childhood history of maltreatment and abuse means that the perpetrator adoptive mother acted, treated and put the adoptive child in a harm-filled experience. The acknowledgment of the abuse is the acknowledgment of the perpetrator's intentional harm and the painful effect that the adoptive mother's cruelty caused the child. The acknowledging of this personal truth causes all current circumstances to be understood and lifts the Adoption Fog to see the past objectively clear, and voids all of the excuses that the parent gave to justify their unpredictable reactions against the trusting child. The adopted child was not allowed to talk about or ask "why" mom beat me, this time or that time. as the adopted child lives in perpetual fear the next punishment and possible repercussions of punishments. The subject of yesterday's slapping was brought up, or mother is proudly re-telling another potential punishing family member of the adopted child's crime that was disrespectfully committed and punished yesterday, would cause her to re-experience her anger and strike the adopted child again, and the family member would also participate in punishing the child again by yelling, screaming and striking the adopted child each time the subject is discussed.
The adopted child deserved all beatings, verbal abuse and public humiliations as the adopted child provokes and brings on all parent attacks on by disobedience, lack of respect and misbehavior. As the adopted child grows older and more unlike the appearance of the adoptive family, the parent anger and intolerance toward the adopted child becomes unmanageable rage which leads the adopted child to seek escape from the adoptive family's brutality. The adoptive parents repetitive threats to throw the child into the street become a reality. To publicly ostracize and be rid of the ungrateful adopted child for good, is a welcome change to the adoptive parents, who see child adoption as their greatest regret and damage to the biological family cohesion by the needs of the outsider, causing the biological children to have less.
The adopted child that simply goes away in disgrace, is the greatest expectation, but not always the case.