The Interpersonal Conflict of Coping in the Adopted Children, Adult Adoptee's Can Not Change the pattern of hyper-vigilance and Constant Fear From Consequences Not Yet Committed, It Is Their Life.
The young adopted child listens, is quiet, and sits motionless trying to maintain this expected compliant behavior without interrupting, sit up straight, do not talk, eyes fixed, be silent.
The adoptive mother is reading a story to the adopted child. This is supposed to be a kind of reward, but the child can only focus on the behaviors that will not make the parent angry during the parent's demand for silent attention while the parent reads the story. All the child can do is try very hard not to anger mother with my voice or fidgeting body, I hold my breath to keep from talking. The child has no recollection of the actual story and the child is expected to be grateful to the parent for taking the parent's limited and precious time away from the parent and force the time on the child.
The parent is reading a book of metaphors that the child can apply to his life. The child didn't hear the story, doesn't know what a metaphor is and is afraid to interrupt the parent to ask, as he will get into trouble. The child's coping mechanisms are where the child's attention is always focused. The control freak mother's one sided dialogue with herself may go terribly wrong if the child breaks character during time in the hot-seat. The dysfunctional home and mother's inconsistent behavior keep the adopted child on hyper alert at all times to anticipate trauma.