Adoptee Rage! This blog is written exclusively for the 38% of Abused and Neglected Adopted Children. The U.S. HHSA Identifies #1 Risk: Maltreatment, Child Abuse and Risk for Death In Adopted children. Childhood domination, Coping compensation. Research in Adoption Psychology, Developmental Trauma"The Adoption Paradox". By Rainstorm Red-Smith
About Adoptee Rage
Statistics Identify large populations of Adoptees in prisons, mental hospitals and committed suicide.
Fifty years of scientific studies on child adoption resulting in psychological harm to the child and
poor outcomes for a child's future.
Medical and psychological attempts to heal the broken bonds of adoption, promote reunions of biological parents and adult children. The other half of attempting to repair a severed Identity is counselling therapy to rebuild the self.
Thursday, January 23, 2014
The Forced False Self-Concept of an Adopted Child
The Forced False Self-Concept of an Adopted Child
The adoption assimilation force the child to betray the true self.
Psychologist Dr. Carl Rogers hypothesized and proved that
"psychologically healthy people actively move away from roles created by others' expectations, and instead look within themselves for validation, truth and self creation of self truth.
Especially valid in the Adopted Child who has been conditioned to compliance, and forced to accept a secondary and false identity to appease the non-biological parent's fear based cognition in non-biological parenting.
The hope for bonding by the adoption facilitators, that the adopting parents become attached to the adopted child in infancy and before the cuteness of the child's appearance is grown out of. Before the adopted child begins to look like the rest of his family which is a world of appearance difference than how the adoptive family's looks. The unspoken drive to fit in is purposely enabled by telling the child the fact that he is not biologically connected to the parents. Another "Hope" by adoption facilitators that the child will unconsciously be motivated by his differences to assimilate his behaviors toward behaving "like" acting like the other family members. The psychology experts from long ago believed that the drive for survival could possibly over-ride the principals of the psychological self identity for the purpose of assimilation. Yet the ego and the ID resist assimilation and conforming due to the ostracized child's psychological manipulation by the adoptive parents and the rejection of the parenting principal of treating the child as a unique individual. The child manipulation principals of assimilation work only from early childhood to pre-adolescence due to the emerging cognitive understanding of the adoption paradox. The psychological manipulation and the utilization of "Guilt Complex" is a sturdy back-up plan for most adoptive parents when facing a child that is growing into the cognitive understanding phase of adolescence. Yet the guilt complex promotes psychological dysfunction in adopted children's already compromised personality-identity disorder.
The conditioning of the child to perform expected behaviors to gain approval from the adoptive parents. The adopted child seeks approval, approval received from adoptive parents this exchange is constituted as the adoptive parent-child relationship and must be constantly proven on a daily basis. The opposite is known as unconditional attachment between parent and biological offspring in which the child receives positive favor from the adult parent regardless of the child's good or bad behavior. Children raised in unconditional love parental relationships have the freedom to explore, develop and manipulate their environments to the satisfaction of the child's whims.
From Birth The Development of a Child's Identity
The Self Concept Of IDENTITY
One's self-concept (also called self-construction, self-identity, or self-perspective) is a collection of beliefs about oneself that includes elements such as academic performance, gender roles and sexuality, and racial identity.Generally, self-concept embodies the answer to "Who am I?"
One's self-concept is made up of self-schemas, and their past, present, and future selves.
Self-concept is distinguishable from self-awareness, which refers to the extent to whichself-knowledge is defined, consistent, and currently applicable to one's attitudes anddispositions. Self-concept also differs from self-esteem: self-concept is a cognitive or descriptive component of one's self (e.g. "I am a fast runner"), while self-esteem is evaluative and opinionated (e.g. "I feel good about the fact that I am a fast runner").
Self-concept is made up of one's self-schemas, and interacts with self-esteem, self-knowledge, and the social self to form the self as whole. It includes the past, present, and future selves, where future selves (or possible selves) represent individuals' ideas of what they might become, what they would like to become, or what they are afraid of becoming. Possible selves may function as incentives for certain behavior.
The perception people have about their past or future selves is related to the perception of their current self. The temporal self-appraisal theory argues that people have a tendency to maintain a positive self-evaluation by distancing themselves from their negative self and paying more attention to their positive one. In addition, people have a tendency to perceive the past self less favorably (e.g. "I'm better than I used to be") and the future self more positively (e.g. "I will be better than I am now").
Psychologists Carl Rogers and Abraham Maslow were the first to establish the notion of self-concept. According to Rogers, everyone strives to reach "ideal self".
Rogers also hypothesized and proved that psychologically healthy people actively move away from roles created by others' expectations, and instead look within themselves for validation.
Especially valid in the Adopted Child who has been conditioned to perform in particular expected behaviors by the adoptive parents.
On the other hand, neurotic people have "self-concepts that do not match their experiences...They are afraid to accept their own experiences as valid, so they distort them, either to protect themselves or to win approval from others."
The self-categorization theory developed by John Turner states that the self-concept consists of at least two "levels": a personal identity and a social one. In other words, one's self-evaluation relies on self-perceptions and how others perceive them. Self-concept can alternate rapidly between the personal and social identity. Children and adolescents begin integrating social identity into their own self-concept in elementary school by assessing their position among peers. By age 5, acceptance from peers has a significant impact on children's self-concept, affecting their behavior and academic success.
Erikson recognized the basic notions of Freudian theory, but believed that Freud misjudged some important dimensions of human development. Erikson said that humans develop throughout their life span, while Freud said that our personality is shaped by the age of five. Erikson developed eight psychosocial stages that humans encounter throughout their life. The stages are Trust vs. Mistrust, Autonomy vs. Shame & Doubt, Initiative vs. Guilt, Industry vs. Inferiority, Identity vs. Role Confusion, Intimacy vs. Isolation, Generativity vs. Stagnation, and Integrity vs. Despair.
The first stage, Trust vs. Mistrust, occurs from approximately birth to one year. Erikson defined trust as an essential trustfulness of others as well as a fundamental sense of one's own trustworthiness. He thought that an infant who gets fed when he is hungry and comforted when he needs comforting will develop trust. He also said that some mistrust is necessary to learn to discriminate between honest and dishonest persons. If mistrust wins over trust in this stage, the child will be frustrated, withdrawn, suspicious, and will lack self-confidence.
The second stage, Autonomy vs. Shame & Doubt, occurs between ages two and three. During this period it is important that the parents create a supportive atmosphere in which the child can develop a sense of self-control without a loss of self-esteem. Shame and doubt about the child's self-control and independence occur if basic trust was insufficiently developed or was lost such as when the child's will is broken by an over controlling parent. In this stage, Erikson said the child encounters rules, such as which areas of the house he is allowed to explore.
The third stage, Initiative vs. Guilt, occurs between ages four and five. This is the stage in which the child must find out what kind of person he/she is going to be. The child develops a sense of responsibility which increases initiative during this period. If the child is irresponsible and is made to feel too anxious then they will have uncomfortable guilt feelings. Erikson believed that most guilt is quickly compensated for by a sense of accomplishment.
Erikson's fourth stage, Industry vs. Inferiority, occurs between six years and puberty. This is the period in which the child wants to enter the larger world of knowledge and work. One of the great events of this time is the child's entry into school. This is where he is exposed to the technology of his society: books, multiplication tables, arts and crafts, maps, microscopes, films, and tape recorders. However, the learning process does not only occur in the classroom according to Erikson, but also at home, friend's houses, and on the street. Erikson said that successful experiences give the child a sense of industry, a feeling of competence and mastery, while failure gives them a sense of inadequacy and inferiority, a feeling that one is a good-for-nothing.
Components of Erikson's prior four stages contribute to the fifth stage, Identity vs. Identity Confusion. This occurs during adolescence. During this period the identity concern reaches climax. According to Erikson
"this is the time when adolescents seek their true selves".
Erikson's sixth stage, Intimacy vs. Isolation, occurs during young adulthood. Intimacy with other people is possible only if a reasonably well integrated identity emerges from stage five.
The main concern of Erikson's seventh stage, Generativity vs. Stagnation, is to assist the younger generation in developing and leading useful lives. When the individual feels that he has done nothing to help the next generation then they experience stagnation.
The final stage, Integrity vs. Despair, occurs during late adulthood. This is the time in which the individual looks back and evaluates their life. If the previous stages have developed properly then they will experience integrity. If the previous stages have not developed in a positive way then they will feel despair.
Erikson believed that development is primarily qualitative because changes are stage like, but also quantitative as one's identity becomes stronger and one's convictions solidify. He believed that nature determines the sequence of the stages and sets the limits within which nurture operates. However, all must pass through one stage before entering the next in the stated order.