About Adoptee Rage

Statistics Identify large populations of Adoptees in prisons, mental hospitals and committed suicide.
Fifty years of scientific studies on child adoption resulting in psychological harm to the child and
poor outcomes for a child's future.
Medical and psychological attempts to heal the broken bonds of adoption, promote reunions of biological parents and adult children. The other half of attempting to repair a severed Identity is counselling therapy to rebuild the self.

Thursday, October 31, 2013

Rayne Wolf's List of Self Protective and Inspirational Words


Quotes to help sustain mental awareness of cruel mothers

Toxic Adoptive Mother Link to author's page

1. My toxic mother won’t kill me. If she could, she would have already.
2. Any guilt I feel regarding my toxic mother was planted, watered and tended by my mother.
3. If my toxic mother were a co-worker or neighbor and I moved away, I’d never visit her again.
4. Family secrets instill guilt and shame. Are you being paid to keep family secrets? It’s not my job to keep family secrets.

5. If I hear my mother’s voice in my head belittling me, I will tell her out loud that she’s wrong. It’s okay.
8. 5 ways to say no to my toxic mother:
A. No, I won’t be doing that.
B. No, don’t count on my being there.
C. No, I’m done subjecting myself to your drama.
D. No, I choose not to accept the stress.
E. No, I have more positive things to do.
9. I can tell my toxic mother that as I’ve grown into a woman (or man) I’ve developed a better understanding of the choices she made. (That should shut her up for a few moments).
10. My toxic mother can only intimidate me if I let her. While she’s busy trying to bully the child me, the adult me can reject her, ignore her, correct her, or report her to authorities.
11. I will amuse myself to avoid getting sucked in to her games. I will keep an egg timer, a pad and paper by the phone. I will tally the lies, the guilt trips and the demands she can make in 3 minutes. Then I will hang up
13. Repeat after me: My toxic mother does not live in my head. She lives in her head.
14. When relatives and friends say they can’t understand how I can treat my mother the way I do, I’ll consider telling them the truth.
15. I know that a toxic mother is an unnatural disaster.
16. I can laugh or I can cry. I will laugh. It’ll annoy the hell out of my toxic mother.
17. I will never hand my toxic “mom bomb” the match.
18. On Mother’s Day and other family holidays I will focus on the positive women (and men) in my life. I will thank them for their caring, kindness and encouragement.
19. The cruel rule of RSVP is that the one person you hope will decline always comes. I promise to never actually extend an invitation to an event at which I’d hate to see my toxic mother.
21. I will give my toxic mother the one gift she never gave me: the truth.
22. I will not let my toxic mother rob me of rich friendships with women who on the surface remind me of her. (What are the odds your mother had an even more evil twin?).
23. Remember what my dad said: nobody can resist a joyous womanI chose to remain joyous in spite of my mother.
24. I am open to consider that my toxic mother may have been treated even more badly as a child than I was. (This thought could keep you from throwing something).
25. I know there is no dishonor in retreat. I know that refusing to join in battle is a small victory when it comes to toxic mothers.
28. I will stare down my toxic mom fears until they fear me more.
29. That which is most personal is most universal. I know people will understand if I simply say, “My mother is not a nice person, but I am.”
30. Whose little girl am I? I can be my own little girl. I can care for and nurture her myself.
It is my sincerest hop that these healing affirmations help you in dealing with your toxic mother.
Rayne Wolfe’s dream is to write her first book Confessions of an Undutiful Daughter . She completed her dream journey May on 8WD after a year living her dream. You can find her at Toxic Mom Toolkit on Facebook. Her book on toxic mothers is about to be published.  We will feature it here just as soon as it is available.