About Adoptee Rage

Statistics Identify large populations of Adoptees in prisons, mental hospitals and committed suicide.
Fifty years of scientific studies on child adoption resulting in psychological harm to the child and
poor outcomes for a child's future.
Medical and psychological attempts to heal the broken bonds of adoption, promote reunions of biological parents and adult children. The other half of attempting to repair a severed Identity is counselling therapy to rebuild the self.

Friday, April 26, 2013

Pregnant Out Of Wedlock


Pregnant Out Of Wedlock..

The phrase originated in England around the 1890's.
The American-Christians culture used the phrase to
punish unmarried women and stigmatize the child.
The culture lived in fear of public scrutiny and the
formal banishment from the Christian Church.
The Ignorant mob mentality that enjoyed the act                         of publicly humiliating individuals. Only women were
shamed, not the men who caused the pregnancy.  
The shame of being "In Trouble" is responsible for
separating women from their children in adoption.
An emotion and being banished from mean people
is the reason so many women gave their children

Abuse In Childhood Parent Is Mentally Labeled Abuser Forever


Denial of Child Abuse By Parents is no longer acceptable.

Because parents are the abusers of children, the reality of
who abused the child is evident. The memory failure routine
of parents is no longer a valid excuse, Nor is the discrediting
of a children's recall of events from childhood. Stressful events
in childhood are filed in the brain to be reused. The information
of being abused is now a safety mechanism within the abused child's brain of what and who to avoid to be safe. As Abuse is
not a typical function or experience. Abuse is a threat to the
safety of a human being. In abuse victims it creates a flight or
flight response to act now, if being challenged or yelled at as
an adult the brain and body react to the parent's stern behavior. In adulthood, to hear a parent talking sternly, having an angry tone in the voice, a signal from the body says beware, run. The
fear behavior of a child-now adult is as strong as ever, to fear the abusing parent. Something that is never outgrown or learned to control. Once an abuser, always an abuser in the victim's brain and body response to hear the abuser's angry voice. The fear of a parent's anger is encoded within us throughout our adult lives, Leaving no room for healthy adult
relationships with prior abusive parents.

MRI Evidence of Parental Abuse of Adopted Children


Abuse and Neglect of Adopted Children

79.4% of Abuse is Perpetrated By Parents, Adoptive Parents.

Especially in Infancy, the abuse consequences are easily seen as evidence in the child's behavior., Now MRI studies can show the abuse evidence in the MRI scans of the brains of children and adults.

Child neglect, often overlooked, is the most common form of child maltreatment.[1] Most perpetrators of child abuse and neglect are the parents themselves. A total of 79.4% of the perpetrators of abused and neglected children are the parents of the victims, and of those 79.4% parents, 61% exclusively neglect their children.[2] The physical, emotional, and cognitive developmental impacts from child neglect in early childhood can be detrimental as the effects from the neglect can carry on into adulthood.
Research has shown that by the time a child reaches the age of six, if he/she has experienced adverse exposures, such as neglect, his/her chances of having overall poor physical health increases by two-fold.[3] Infants can develop poor physical health if neglect starts even before the child is born. A child deprived of basic necessities, such as proper pre-natal care, is at risk of being born prematurely or having complications during birth.


A common outcome of medical neglect is failure to thrive in infants and children. This problem arises when a child is deprived of adequate nutrition or withheld from necessary medical attention required for proper physical growth and development.[4] As a result, the neglected child is left with potentially permanent physical disabilities.

Attachment and Avoidance of Intimate Relationships

A developing child requires proper nutrition, protection, and regulation for healthy attachment. About 80% of neglected children display attachment disorder symptoms and eventually form insecure attachments to their caregivers as a result of caregivers' unresponsive interactions.[5] This disturbed attachment to their primary caregiver alters future relationships with peers by becoming emotional and physically isolated from others reducing the likelihood of forming emotional connections.[6] Moreover, as a result of their past maltreatment, neglected children feel that forming intimate relationships with others loses their control in life and exposes them by increasing their vulnerability.[7]

Emotional Deregulation

Neglected children demonstrate lack of emotional regulation, understanding emotional expressions by others, and difficulty in distinguishing emotions.[8] When posed with problem-solving tasks, neglected children reacted with anger and frustration, and were less enthusiastic with completing a new task.[9] Neglected children often have distressing memories of their past to which they regulate their emotions by suppressing them.[7]

Cognitive and Academic Development

Neuroimaging studies using magnetic resonance imaging have shown that the brain structure of a neglected child is significantly altered. The overall cerebral volume of the brain of a neglected child is significantly diminished, with a reduced midsagittal area of the corpus callosum, and the ventricular system is enlarged thereby resulting in decreased cognitive growth, development, and functioning.[13][14] Further studies show that neglected children have poor cerebral hemisphereintegration and underdevelopment of the orbitofrontal cortex region which affects the child’s social skills.[15]
Studies on academic progress in neglected children have indicated that these children may experience a drop in their academic performance. Children who have experienced neglect are more likely to have attention deficits and poorer academic achievements.[16] Further, neglect in early childhood can result in a rise in stress levels in the child.[10] Elevated stress levels from neglect can lead to a release of higher levels of cortisol causing damage to the hippocampus which can affects a child’s learning and memory.[17]
A study examining the motor, language, and cognitive development of neglected children showed that the scores from theBayley Scales of Infant Development were significantly lower than non-maltreated children.[9] Neglected children displayed poor self-control and a lack of creativity in solving problem.[9] Standardized tests become a challenge for neglected children as they perform poorly on intellectual functioning and academic achievement.[9] Further, neglected children perform significantly poorer on IQ tests than non-maltreated children.[18]




Thursday, April 25, 2013

ADOPTEE RAGE!  ......Our shameful Throw-Away Culture

In the U.S. we buy whatever is imaginable, desirable, and
the various objects that can entertain us at home. If a movie
comes out with Dalmation dogs we buy them as cute puppies.
They begin to outgrow the box in the garage, so we keep moving the dog farther away from the family until we abandon
the animal in some remote location where we can't get caught.
American citizens do whatever they want regardless of laws, Just not getting caught mentality. When animal control arrests
another Dalmation as the kennels are now full of them, and they gas them all to death...still no conscious objection, guilt or responsibility taken. Adopting children is no different except the children do not gassed to death when they are not wanted. Yet
what does this "buying of children" say about Americans, and
the feeding frenzy to adopt overseas children? No classes and no psychological placements or personal accountability, and the adoptive parents get the Saint title for saving children from their
own family, heritage and culture. Shame.

Monday, April 22, 2013

The Unrealistic Expectation of Grattitude

To hold back your anger from cruel and
cold people that you do not belong, yet are owned by.The fictional birth certificate bears the deception invented
by a parent hypocrisy,
cultural distortion,and
and a country's greed.

The Adoptee's has the right to feel anger, and all other emotions that goes along with human situations. Unrealistic expectations are created by people outside
of the group and not members of the group they are judging.
The public expectation of grattitude is an unrealistic burden on adopted children. Are biological children expected to convey gratitude toward their parents for the parent's choice to bear children. Parenting is a choice, not an expectation. Parenting is a temporary state that should lead to a child's self sufficiency.
We Adoptee's have the right to be angry, in a society that sells other people's  children. The children sold in adoption, grow up and realize something is terribly wrong. Living a dual identity is extremely difficult and morally wrong. In adolescence we realize the monumental reality of being adopted and can not properly compartmentalize the dual identity as it is a falsehood. The untruth does not come together naturally into making sense.
The truth of adoptee's identity is how the adoption triad comes full circle, ending in the truth of who I Am. Who I am Not is who they wanted me to be is a predictable guarantee of failure. When the adoptee turns 18, the day we hope for, wait for and dream of the day freedom begins. To many Adoptee's the magic day of the eighteenth birthday will guarantee freedom and provide a point in time that the sharade is over. The time of the beginning of a new life, far distanced from the child who was owned by a family that treated her without dignity, respect and
did not genuinely celebrate the way doteing parents support the biological child that they adore. Adoptee's have provided the service that was expected of their innocent childhood. On the eighteenth birthday, all Adoptee's should automatically receive the real and factual birth certificate that clearly displays their true identity's name. The truth is deserved, Important to sanity and human growth, and reconcile with the biological parents.
We want change of current laws, studies prove that the keeping of secrets causes great pain, psychological conditions and is destructive to all parties involved. Secrets are the root of the adoptee's problem and also the simplest to answer. Adoptee's
want accountability and freedom from lies and deception of adoption industry.The fact that there is no one responsible for
the destruction to millions of people by the adoption Industry.
There is NO government accountability and due to the revenue
generated by the adoption industry, government's hands reach in to the money pot. We adults must evolve beyond secrets.

ADOPTEE'S Identity, When Everything You Know Is Wrong

ADOPTEE RAGE!          
              When everything you knew about yourself is wrong.

I am at the point where everything I knew about myself has morphed into a scramble of identity facts. My self Identity is at a standstill. While I sift through the wreckage of who I was, And knowing that who I was, is all a lie.

Searching for answers in psychology, I see many titles of
adoption sites advertising adoptee's identity crisis like a case
of chicken pox, everyone gets it... The Pro-Adoption mentality
discounts the Adoptee's struggle with invalidating get over it.
Dual Identity is not something Adoptee's can easily "get over"
as we have been psychologically damaged by it.

There are numerous strategies and other ways to combat the adopted child's expected realization that they are not who the adopted family says they are. The dual identity can not be avoided, no matter how many studies are conducted. The adoptee will figure it out and surpress the themselves into
the predictable "adoptee silence", pretend they are fine and
in theory move on. Only to manifest in adulthood as a mental
break that will stop all activity until their identity is resolved .

Sunday, April 21, 2013

Adoptee Perspective


Adoptee's are the victims of other people's bad decision making.

The Future of Children.org to View the entire article:
Perspectives on Adoption
Annette Baran Reuben Pannor
In some ways, adoptees are the victims in the adoption triangle. Others made decisions for and about them. They had no role in being conceived, born, relinquished, and placed for adoption. However, as they move out of their childhood into maturity, they should assert certain rights and assume certain responsibilities. Adoptees who are growing up with knowledge of two sets of parents should be encouraged to gain knowledge about adoption and to explore ways of understanding their dual identity and its impact on them. Adoption is one aspect of their being which needs to be woven into the fabric of their lives.

Friday, April 19, 2013

Psychological Abuse

Adoptee Rage!      

Psychological Abuse of Adopted Children

In the family

English, et al.[52] report that children whose families are characterized by interpersonal violence, including psychological aggression and verbal aggression, may exhibit a range of serious disorders, including chronic depressionanxietypost-traumatic stress disorderdissociation and anger. Additionally, English et al. report that the impact of emotional abuse "did not differ significantly" from that of physical abuse. Johnson et al.[53] report that, in a survey of female patients, 24% suffered emotional abuse, and this group experienced higher rates of gynecological problems. In their study of men emotionally abused by a wife/partner or parent, Hines and Malley-Morrison[54] report that victims exhibit high rates of post traumatic stress disorder, drug addiction and alcoholism.
Glaser,D. Study
Glaser, D.[55] reports, "An infant who is severely deprived of basic emotional nurturance, even though physically well cared for, can fail to thrive and can eventually die. Babies with less severe emotional deprivation can grow into anxious and insecure children who are slow to develop and who have low self-esteem." Glaser also informs that the abuse impacts the child in a number of ways, especially on their behavior, including: "insecurity, poor self-esteem, destructive behavior, angry acts (such as fire setting and animal cruelty), withdrawal, poor development of basic skills, alcohol or drug abuse, suicide, difficulty forming relationships and unstable job histories." Also, these children often grow up to become parents who abuse their own children, either emotionally or otherwise, due to the child's development being impaired in all domains of functioning.
Oberlander, et al.[56] performed a study which discovered that among the youth, those with a history of maltreatment showed that emotional distress is a predictor of early initiation of sexual intercourse. Oberlander, et al. state, "A childhood history of maltreatment, including...psychological abuse, and neglect, has been identified as a risk factor for early initiation of sexual intercourse...In families where child maltreatment had occurred, children were more likely to experience heightened emotional distress and subsequently to engage in sexual intercourse by age 14. It is possible that maltreated youth feel disconnected from families that did not protect them and subsequently seek sexual relationships to gain support, seek companionship, or enhance their standing with peers." It is apparent that psychological abuse sustained during childhood is a predictor of the onset of sexual conduct occurring earlier in life, as opposed to later.


Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Reasons Not To Adopt A Child


Reasons Not to Adopt
By adoptionassistance.org

   Things that might create concern about whether adoption of a child is the right thing or that this is the right time might be:
  • Unresolved grief (over lost pregnancies/babies, lost fertility, lost loved ones, etc.)
  • Ongoing fertility treatments
  • Unresolved trauma or abuse in your past
  • Unresolved marital tensions
  • Unstable financial condition or difficulty managing finances
  • Significant people in your support system who are unsupportive of adoption
  • Unresolved criminal or child abuse/neglect charges
  • Unsound motivations for adopting
     We have learned that individuals who have not had the time, opportunity or help to work through their grief are less able to withstand the roller coaster of emotions with the adoptive process, but also have an increased risk of not bonding well with their adoptive baby.  Often this type of grief work is relatively short-term work and once done leaves the couples/individuals feeling much stronger.  Our agency policy requires that couples not pursue fertility treatments while pursuing adoption.  There are a number of reasons, one of which is that we have had couples become pregnant after being selected by a birthmom and then there is a dilemma with the birthmom.  The most important reason, however, is that each child deserves to come into a family where the parents’ hearts are totally focused on welcoming and embracing that child.  This is simply not possible when the couple is pursuing fertility treatments as well.  It is like trying to drive down two roads at the same time.  
     Unresolved trauma or abuse in your past will come back to haunt you as you parent children.  That is risky for the child and for the parent.  Our desire for you is that if you move into parenting, you will experience great success but know that this is unlikely if there are unresolved past issues such as these.  
Couples who are struggling in their relationship sometimes feel that if they can just have a family (children), those rough spots will smooth out.  It never really works this way.  Children are amazing but, honestly, very challenging at times.  They do not reduce the stress on a relationship, they increase it.  Then if the relationship deteriorates, there is a wounded child/children as well.  Fixing a hurting relationship is an example of an unsound motivation for adopting.  Any motivation where the child enters the family with a job to do, such as to heal a marriage, fill an empty hole in a parent, make a parent feel better about themselves,  make a parent feel loved, be grateful for being “rescued”, make a family look better, is an unsound motivation and will likely set the stage for wounding and heartache.    
People Who Should Not Adopt a Child...
Mothers who don't like to get up in the morning. Mothers who don't like to cook every day, breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Mothers who don't want the child to grow up., Mothers who
dominate and control a child will abuse the child. Mothers who want to relive their childhood through an adopted child, the child will not want to do the activities you missed out on. 
What about alcoholism and how an adopted child will interfere with your bar attendance., Constant fighting, bickering
and arguing between husband and wife., Violence in the
home, punching holes in walls and patching them is a sign
of violence in the home. 

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

The Birth Mother Who's Baby was Stolen By Adopters, The Stolen Baby's Mother

ADOPTEE RAGE           "The Stolen Baby's Mother" Is every biological mother 
                                 That was forced, coerced and made to submit to the
                                 to the torture that is Adoption.

The Stolen Baby's Mother
The dirty Adoption workers from the 1950's - 1980's These disreputable people, treatment of others and evil behavior of Adoption workers. The damage to hundreds of millions of women and children surviving today. The truth of these filthy people is the filth of the lies they told rendered permanent psychological damage to countless suffering people and promoted suicide of many now motherless women. The only shame I see is the Adoption Industrie's selling of children, and want-to-be parents paying the ransom on stolen children of other parents.  
All Biological mothers who were forced into adoption, The greedy adoption
Industry that feeds on helpless mothers. Adoption workers abduct and steal babies to make lots of money, this year the adoption Industry reached 5 Billion. 
The only time in a woman's life where she is truely helpless is late pregnancy.
The time adoption salesmen manipulate and deceive the young.
Pregnant women were preyed on by big business. Like a victim of rape, these women were stripped of their child, and discarded as subhuman. But the torture of a missing child last a lifetime. The natural urge to find your blood is inherent in all adoptees, and eventually the search and reunion come.

Sunday, April 14, 2013

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Thursday, April 11, 2013

Adopting a Child Process of Events: "Adoption Disruption Abandonment and death"


 What Exactly Constitutes Attachment:

 Attachment develops as a result of predictable experiences of enjoyable social interactions connected with everyday care routines. It can't be forced and is not "cupboard love"--- that is, attachment to an adult is not connected with receiving food from that adult (although often fun social interactions are associated with eating). 


                                                                     This is NOT an attachment example  

Children become attached to adults when they recognize the adults' power and authority, so adoptive parents need to make sure the children are completely dependent on them for all their needs.
Reality:  Attachment develops as a result of predictable experiences of enjoyable social interactions connected with everyday care routines. It can't be forced and is not "cupboard love"--- that is, attachment to an adult is not connected with receiving food from that adult (although often fun social interactions are associated with eating). Withholding food so a child has to depend on the adult for it, or preventing a child from feeding herself when it is developmentally appropriate for her to do this, are likely to have the unfortunate consequences of reducing children's food intake. A number of cases where adopted children were injured or killed have involved food deprivation or provision of unpalatable or indigestible foods (for instance, in the case of Viktor Matthey, who died as a result of malnutrition, exposure, and injuries).

View the complete article at: Psychologytoday.com/blog/child-myths/201004/adoption-disruption-abandonment-death

Jean Mercer
Jean Mercer is a developmental psychologist with a special interest in parent-infant relationships.

Adoption, Disruption, Abandonment, Death

Myths about adoption may make a hard job harder.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Murder of Foreign Born Adopted Children,Foreign Adoption Failure,Foreign Born Adoptee's

Adoptee Rage              Murder of Foreign Born Adopted Children

Question to foreign born adoptee's:
#1. How do foreign born children feel about being adopted?
#2. Why do Americans adopt children abroad?
#3 What studies have been done on the impact/outcomes?
#4 Does the"Ownership of Adoptees"apply to foreign born?
#5 What are the main problems of adoptive parents,go abroad?

On the morning of July 1, 2005, Hilt was packing for a family vacation, all the while downing one beer after another and growing increasingly aggravated and impatient with Nina's antics. "Everything she did just got to me," Hilt said. When Hilt caught her reaching into her diaper and smearing feces on the walls and furniture, "a year and a half of frustration came to a head," Hilt says. "I snapped. I felt this uncontrollable rage."
Then Hilt did something unthinkable. She grabbed Nina around the neck, shook her and then dropped her to the floor, where she kicked her repeatedly before dragging her up to her room, punching her as they went. "I had never hit a child before," she says. "I felt horrible and promised myself that this would never happen again." But it was too late for that. Nina woke up with a fever, and then started vomiting. The next day she stopped breathing. By the time the ambulance got the child to the hospital, she was dead.
This poorly written story tells how a child is murdered by the adopting parent. 
While avoiding accountability of adopting parents who go over 
seas to buy a child that can not find their real family in the future. 
The writer tries to persuade the reader that this situation is rare, not common and 
unusual, Trying not to disrupt the business as usual of buying foreign children. 
The article points the blame at "those people" who tricked ,lied and manipulated 
the innocent adopting parents.....but the child was still alive in "those people's" 
care. The business of adopting foreign children is great and thriving.
Hilt's story is awful—and rare—but sadly it is not unique. Adopting a child from another country is usually a positive, enriching experience for both the child and the parent. Over the last 20 years, foreign adoption has become more popular, and Americans now adopt about 20,000 children from Guatemala, China, Russia and other nations each year. (In the last few years, as restrictions and red tape have increased in some countries, the number of overseas adoptions has begun to drop.) Longitudinal studies show that most of these kids do quite well, but in a small but significant number of cases, things go very badly. Since the early 1990s, the deaths of 14 Russian children killed by their adoptive parents have been documented. (That disclosure was partly responsible for Russia's decision in 2006 to suspend its intercountry adoption program while it underwent review.)

Sunday, April 7, 2013

Adoptive Parent Hostility Toward their Adopted Children

Adoptee Rage               Hostility Toward Adoptive Children

Adoptive parent's hostility toward their adopted child.
This topic has been exclusively studied, proven and published in
medical and scientific journals.

Adoptive parents' hostility toward their adopted children

Summit Institute, Jerusalem, Israel
Children and Youth Services Review (impact factor: 1.27). 02/1984; DOI:10.1016/0190-7409(84)90053-7
ABSTRACT This paper focuses on the latent, underlying hostility that we feel exists between adoptive parents and their adopted children. The focus of this study is on the adolescent adoptee who is struggling with a “double” identity-crisis. Also addressed are countertransference feelings between the adoptive parent and the adolescent adoptee.
0  0 

Saturday, April 6, 2013

The Adoptee's Experience an Epiphany of their Adoption Realization

Adoptee Rage    When The Reality of Your Adoption Hits...

Epiphany: The experience of Sudden, Striking, Realization.

Adoption Realization: A triggered event, exposing suppressed
                               emotional feelings not before expressed
                               about being adopted, given-away., A
                               mother surrendering her child forever.,
                               The child victim sold to strangers. What
                               happen to that child and mother. This
                               emotional action of grieving for the child
                               and mother at the most basic human level.

Adoptee's can deny their adoption experience as long as they can, until this emotionally triggered event, cracks them wide open., This is an uncontrolled emotional melt down, that has included various aspects individual to the Adoptee's adoption.
The fact that you were stolen from your mother's trusting, loving and safe environment. Child is stolen after the birthing process which is forever an assault upon human dignity.
Animals are never separated from mothers at birth for risk of death to the newly born. A stolen child can never be repaired with the richest of prospective adoptive parents. The newborn's rejection of the New mother, causes the new mother to reject
the newborn infant. As the New mother is not naturally inclined to the baby as the baby's real mother's natural response and awareness to the child's needs. The new mother is not aware nor has she gone through the pregnancy year with the child growing inside her. This New mother is flawed chemically and emotionally fragile to her own needs. The rejection cycle for new mom is perpetual, she feels rejected and she ignores the baby's needs. The new mother's psychological problems and insecurities grow larger in the cycle of rejection to the point that the baby submits out of hunger. To the new mother, the baby is her possession that she owns. The underlying fear that the real mother could take the baby back, keeps the new mother from
true emotional commitment. Due to the fact that the child is not natural to the new mother,  The new mother will have emotional regard to the child as a possession that she owns.
Read more on Adoption Realization's from Adoptee's stories
Lost Daughters: Round Table/emerging from the fog
www.thelostdaughters.com/emerging from the fog

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Author's List: Published Psychological Studies on Adoption

Adoptee Rage

List of Doctors of Psychology, Adoptee Studies Authors,

Publishing Works on Adoption Not Given Public Attention,
Buried, hidden, disputed, disregarded by adoption industry.
Author's List:

Mc Whinnie. A. M, 1967
 Kirk.D.H.PdD. Jonassohn. K.MA. and Fish.A.D,
  1. Clothier.F. MD.: The Psychology of the Adopted Child. Mental Hygiene 1943. Vol XXVII national Committee for Mental Hygiene Inc. New York.
  2. Harper.J.: Williams. S.: Adopted Children Admitted to Residential Psychiatric Care. Aust J. Social Issues. V.11. No1.1976.
  3. Karelitz. S. MD.: Moderator. Adoptions. Discussion. Pediatrics. Vol 20 1957. 366-386. (Med618.905/3).
  4. Schechter. Marshall. D: Feb 1960. Paper on Observations on Adopted Children. Archives of General Psychiatry. Vol;3. 1960.
  5. Toussieng. P. W.: Personal Communication. April 28 1958.
  6. Clothier. F.: The Psychology of the Adopted Child, Mental Hygiene. 27;7 (April 1943).
  7. Benedek. T.: Adaption to Reality in Early Infancy, Psy choanalyst Quart.7;20 (April 1938).
    1. Gough. D.: 1961. Adoption and the Unwed Mother. Report on Conference at Folkstone 1961.
    2. Toussieng.P.W.: Thoughts Regarding the Etiology of Psychological Difficulties in Adopted Children. 1962. Child Welfare 41, 59-65.
    3. Humphrey. M. And Ounsted. C.: Adoptive Families Referred for Psychiatric Advice. British Journal of Psychiatry (1963) 109, 599-608.
    4. Phipps. P. Adoption: A Study of the Problems Involved in Child Guidance Cases From the Point of View of a Psychiatric Social Worker. Mental Health. 12:98-107.1953.
    5. Lemon. E.M. Rear View Mirror, unpublished manuscript, 1959.
    6. Livermore. J.B.: Some Identification Problems in Adopted Children, paper presented at American Orthopsychiatric Association, New York, March 23-25 1961.
    7. Kirk.D. Jonassohn.K. Fish.A.: Are Adopted Children Especially Vulnerable to Stress? Arch Gen Psychiatry, 14,291-298.
    8. Mc Whinnie. A.M.: Adopted Children. How They Grow Up. 1967. Routledge & Kegan Paul. London.
    9. Roberts. P.: Some of the Needs of the Unmarried Mother Who Keeps Her Child. (Jul/Aug 1968) Social Service. V20. No1.
    10. Borromeo. Sr. M.: Adoption From the Point of the Natural Parents. 1968. Paper. Social Service. V20. Jul/Aug.
    11. Watkins.J.: Motivation of Adoptive Parents. Social Service. V.12. July/Aug. 1968.
    12. Ounsted. C.: The Dark Side of Adoption, paper. 14th October 1970.
    13. Trieseliotis. J.P.: Identity and Adoption. Child Adoption. V4. 1974.
    14. Cavenar. J.: Spaulding. J.: Hammet.E.: Anniversary Reactions. 1976. Psychosomatics. Vol 17. (4) 210-212.
    15. Pollock. G.: Temporal Anniversary Manifestations. Hour. Day. Holiday. Psychonalytic Qrt 40.1971. P123.
    16. Hilgard. J.R.: Anniversarys in Mental Illness Psychiatry XXII. 1959. P.113-121.
    17. Picton. C.: Some Insights Into Adoption: Unintended Consequences of Publicity. Aust Social Work. Vol 30, No-1 March 1977.
    18. Reite. M. Seiler.C. Short.R.: Loss of Your Mother is More Than Loss of a Mother. Am.J. Psychiatry 135:3. March 1978.
    19. Lewis. E.: Page. A.: Failure to Mourn a Stillbirth: An Overlooked Catastrophe. Br. Med Psychology (1978) 51. 237-241.
    20. Pannor.R.: Baran.A.: Sorosky.A.: Birth Parents Who Relinquished Babies for Adoption Revisited. Family Process. V17, Sept 1978.
    21. Rickarby. G.A.: Eagan.P.: Issues of Preventive Work With Adopted Adolescents. Med.J. Aust. 1980. 1; 470-472.
    22. Rickarby.G.A.: Lee. M.M.: Said.J.; Eagan. P.: Adoptive Families in Distress. Aust. Journal Social Issues. 1981. V 16. No 1.
    23. Rynearson.E.K.: Relinquishment and its Maternal Complications: American Jour. Psychiatry. 139:3. March 1982.
    24. Inglis. K.: The Relinquishment Process and Grieving. Proceedings, Third Aust. Conf on Adoption: Changing Families.Adelaide. 1982.
    25. Begleiter.E.: The Medium and Long-Term Aftermath of Relinquishment. Paper. Confer. April 26.1983. Mission of St James & John.
    26. McDermott. K. MD.: Rights of the Relinquishing Mother. Human Rights Commiss. Discussion paper. July 1984. Canberra. ACT.
    27. Silverman. M.A.: Discussion: Adoptive Anxiety, Adoptive Rage, Adoptive Guilt. Psychiatrist Journ. V11. 1985.
    28. Condon. J.T.: The Parental-Foetal Relationship, a Comparison of Male and Female Expectant Parents. Jour. Psychosomatics Obstet. And Gynaecology.4. (1985) 271-284.
    29. Condon. J.T.: Psychological Disability in Women Who Relinquish a Baby for Adoption. Med Jour. Aust. V 144. Feb 1986.
    30. Watson.K. W.: Birth Families: Living with the Adoption Decision. Public Welfare. Spring 1986.
    31. Condon. J, T, : Altered Cognitive Functioning in Pregnant Women; A Shift Toward Primary Process Thinking. Br.J. Med. Psychology 1987. 60.329-334.
    32. Raphael-Leff.J.: (1980). Psychotherapy with Pregnant Women. In B.L. (ed) New York: Human Science Press.
    33. Condon.J.T.: Nature and Determinants of Parent-to-Infant Attachment Dunn.D.J: the Early Postnatal Period. J. Am. Acad. Child Adolesc. Psychiatry. 1988.27.3. 293-299.
    34. Klaus.M.: Kennell.J.: (1970). Human Maternal Behaviour at first Contact With Her Young. Pediatric.46: 187-192.
    35. Caplan.G.: (1961). An Approach to Community Mental Health. New York. Grune and Stratton.
    36. Van Kepple.M. Midford. S. Cicchini. M.: The Experience of Loss in Adoption. Paper. Presented 5th conf. Fremantle. Sept. 1987.
    37. Winker.R.: Brown.D.: Van Keppel. : Blanchard.A.: Clinical Practice in Adoption Psychology Practitioner Guidebooks. 1988.
    38. Gediman. J.G.: Giving up the Baby. Smith Alumne Quartly. Winter 1998.
    39. Kirschner.D.: Nagel.L.: Antisocial behaviour in Adoptees. Patterns, Dynamics. Child and Adol. Soc. Work. V5. No4. 1988.
    40. Treadwell. P.: A Parents Guide to the Problems of Adolescence. 1988. Penguin Books.
    41. Andersen. R.S.: Why Adoptees Search: Motives and More. Child Welfare V. LXVII. No1. Jan/Feb 1988.
    42. Wells S.: On Being a Birth Mother. Adoption and Fostering. V14. N0 2. 1990.
    43. Connolly. M.: The Experience of Living With an Absent Child. University of Alberta. Paper 1987.
    44. Shiffler. L. H.: Adoptions Impact on the Birthmothers: "Can a Mother Forget Her Child". 1991. Florida. Oxford Graduate School.
    45. Kaplan.S.: Silverstein. D: Seven Core Issues of Adoption. Ref. Griffiths 1991. The Right To Know Who You Are.
    46. Raphael-Leff. J.: Adoption. Chapman & Hall. 1991. Boundary Row. London. Isbn 0 412 33630 8.
    47. Wells. S.: Post Traumatic Stress in Birthmothers. Adoption and Fostering V 17. No 2. 1993.
    48. Lauderdale. J.L.: Boyle. J.S.: Infant Relinquishment Through Adoption. Image. Journ. Of Nursing Scholar.V.26. No3. Fall 1994.
    49. Logan.J.: Birth Mothers and Their Mental Health: Uncharted Territory. Br.J. Social Work (1996) 26, 609-625.
    Copyright ©  Origins Inc, 1995

    Origins Inc Supporting People Separated by Adoption


Monday, April 1, 2013

Adoptee's Personality Disorder Guidelines

Adoptee Rage    Diagnosis Adopted-Child-Personality-Disorder
Behind the recurrent behavioural and personality patterns there have emerged emotional and psychodynamic issues specifically linked to adoption.
continued #2

Wilson. : Green. : Soth. : 1986. Report that many adopted adolescent patients in their hospital (10 out of 21) have received a diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder. This diagnosis, made official in the American Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (3rd edition 1980), includes the following symptoms: impulsivity or unpredictability in areas that are potentially self damaging, a pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships with idealization, devaluation and manipulation, inappropriate intense anger.
Identity disturbance was manifested by uncertainty about several issue  relating to identity, intolerence of being alone, affective instability, physically self damaging acts, and chronic feelings of boredom and emptyness. It is theorised that this disorder arose because of deficits in early parenting experiences which did not enable the child to develop a core identity, so they didnt feel part of a fused dyad, which explains their fear of abandonment and intolerence of being alone

at they should look elsewhere than in the children themselves for the factors contributing to later disturbances. The children presented at the Childrens Service tended to present many severe difficulties.
Toussieng also acknowledges that severe emotional disturbances and personality disorders are over-represented among adopted children and that they may have severe emotional difficulties that may never come to the attention of professionals.
He points out that on reaching adulthood some children become obsessed with finding their real mother because they had revealed a feeling of never having been really attached to their adoptive family and never had the feeling of real belonging.
Toussieng refers to Deutsh (1945) where she discusses the influences of unconscious attitudes and conflicts on the abilities of the adoptive mother to be motherly toward their adopted children. She believes that an adoptive mothers failure to develop motherliness is the major cause of later disturbances in the child. They (the mothers) view the adopted child as narcissistic injury, as evidence that they themselves are damaged. The child in trying to identify with such parents may well acquire shaky and defective introjects.
Toussieng summarises by stating "children who have been adopted at an early age and/or who have not been exposed to psychological traumatization before adoption seem to be more prone to emotional disturbances than non-adopted children.

Michael Humphrey and Christopher Ounsted.
Michael Humphrey, M.A. B.Sc Principal Clinical Psychologist. Warneford and Park Hospitals.
Christopher Ounsted. D.M.,D.C.H., D.P.M., Consultant-in Charge Park Hospital for Children.
In a control group of 41 early age adoptees they distinguished the following symptoms. Emotional reactions (tantrums, negativism, jealousy). Enuresis, anxiety, disturbed social behaviour, aggression, withdrawl, stealing, cruelty, destructiveness, lying and encopresis.
They were impressed with finding out that one in two children adopted late had been stealing as compared to one in four children adopted at an early age. The action appeared in several cases to be expressly directed at the adoptive mother, either from a sense of rejection (in some cases well founded) or as an appeal for more individual attention. Sometimes the money would be spent on presents for friends in the hope of gaining popularity. Some of these children have stolen compulsively over a long period with no sign of remorse.
They found the adopted children suffered from varying degrees of parental deprivation, neglect, parental rejection or at the opposite extreme, over-indulgence, mental or physical illness sufficient to impair the quality of parental love, and jealously of a sibling born before or too soon after the adoption.

Schechter.M. Carlson.P.V. Simmons. J.Q. and Work. H.H.
In a paper submitted to the Childrens Bureau, US Department of Health Aug 1963.
The factor of adoption played a consistently important role in the genesis and perpetuation of the given symptom picture. Two major hypotheses were suggested for the higher incidence of psychological disturbances in the adoptee. Firstly the adoptee may intra-physically continue a split between good and bad in his infantile object relations, since in reality he has two sets of parents. Secondly, the adoptive parent is often confused in his or her role due to unconscious guilts and hostilities and tends to project this disturbance backward into the heredity of the child i.e. the natural parents.
Phipps(1953) mentioned the tendency of parents to speak about the heredity of the child as the major causative factor in behavioural difficulties.
Lemon E.M. (1959) referred to the difficulty that the adopted individual has in dealing with communication concerning his adopted status with a resulting tendency to weave factual material together with much fantasied material in his thoughts as he seeks his natural parents.
They went on to say that these patients perceived their adoptive parents as inadequate especially with the setting of limits and viewed their natural parents as their adequate set of parents.
Livermore J. B (1961) suggests that the adoptees have specific problems in identification, since the adoptive mother constantly reactivates primitive unconscious fears that her own insides have been destroyed.
They summarised by saying. "We feel that we have offered substantial evidence from many sources that the non-relative adopted child may be more prone to emotional difficulties".

A statement from the American Journal of Orthopsychiatry 1967.37 402. Mid-Fairfield Child Guidance Centre Norwalk Connecticut.
The number of adopted adolescent children who are referred to our centre and other centres is larger than their ratio in the general population. "We are impressed with the extent to which these children are pre-occupied with the theme of their adoption".
They go on to talk about the similarity of the traits and attitudes in these children which they refer to as the "Adoption Syndrome".

Dr Christopher Ounsted, MA, DM, MRCP, DCH, DPM.
Dr Ounsted states that in the late fifties it had become apparent to him and his colleagues at the Park Street Hospital for Children that they were seeing an unexpectedly large number of adopted children. Many of the children owed their disabilities either to some inate handicap or to defects in the structure of their families, such as having parents who were psychotic, inadequate, psychopathic, defective, or in some other way not able to fulfil their parental roles adequately.
Ounsted noted that of the symptoms of adopted patients, compulsive theft was more significant.

Henry Kemp. Archives of Diseases in Childhood (1971) states that some children may be more vulnerable to abuse than others. Among them are the hyperactive, the precocious, the premature, the stepchild and the adopted.

1974 Dr Triseliotis in his research paper on Identity and Adoption, gives examples of adoptees views on identity.
1st adoptee,
"I look in the mirror and cannot recognise myself".
2nd adoptee,
"I feel there is something about adoption that gives you a feeling of insecurity as regards just exactly who you are".
3rd adoptee,
"I feel that I am only a half a person, the other half obscured by my adoption".
4th adoptee,
"I never really felt I belonged. I feel empty and I find it difficult to make friends or be close to people. I have been hovering on the edge of a break down".

One of the main anxieties of adoptees is the fear of being different and somewhat set apart from the rest.The adopted child has to gradually accept the loss of his natural parents and the "rejection" this implies. Yet he has to also accomodate a preferably positive image of the original set of parents and their genealogy in his developing self.
Children who are adopted into a different culture will still need to identify with aspects of their original heritage.

Bennett Olshaker, MD. In his paper "What shall We Tell the Kids", he notes that the adopted person has to contend with the feeling that he was abandoned, but we can try to help him in a positive manner by portraying his natural parents in a positive manner. He goes on to say that some adoptive parents may feel that their childs' parents were immoral for having a child out of wedlock. These sentiments create difficulties for the parents when the child has questions regarding sexual matters.

Harper.J.; Williams. S. 1976.
This was an investigation over a period of five years from 1969-1974 into 22 adopted children admitted into the childrens unit at North Ryde Psychiatric Centre. Six were referred at age eleven and over, three were referred before their fifth birthday and the remaining thirteen fell between five and ten years and eleven months.
Symptoms in the children ranged from depression, aggressive acting out behaviour to stealing. In some instances stealing was a desperate attempt to buy friendship since the stolen money was to buy sweets and toys for peers. In other instances it seemed to compensate for the loss of the real mother by acquisition of material goods. In all cases it could be seen as a cry for help.
In some instances admission to the unit signals the relinquishing of parental responsibility as evidenced by eight cases where the child was made a ward of the state and placed in a child welfare home. A summary of the various outcomes indicated that they on the whole were unsatisfactory with one third settling back into their adoptive families with a positive prognosis and two thirds demonstrating a breakdown or possible breakdown in the adoptions.
Family trauma and parental pathology was investigated since it was felt that the stress of adoption could not alone account for the severity of symptoms and outcomes in the children. In terms of family trauma one mother and one father suicided after a history of depressive illness, one set of adoptive parents were murdered, two fathers were killed in car accidents with the adoptive child present and three fathers were unusually violent and aggressive men.
In seven cases, the mothers had a history of psychiatric illness prior to the adoption, including one with a schizophrenic illness. In the case of the seven mothers and three fathers for whom a psychiatric diagnosis was made after the adoption, one can only speculate on the degree to which extra-familial stresses and internal pressures contributed toward this decompensation.

Rickarby. G.A. Eagan. P. 1980.
Rickarby and Eagan say that in their and others studies, there has been consistent evidence of morbidity of various types in adopted adolescents. He states that adoptive families are four times more as likely as biological to seek help for their distress. Acting out, degrees of depression, identity crisis and special roles, (the bad one, the mad one, or the sick one) may constitute an adolescent's expression of a families dysfunction.
With the added issues of adoption, adolescent development crises become more difficult and the concomitant distress and behaviour exaggerated. These situations include the adolescent who is unable to communicate to others his frightening or idealized fantasies about his biological parents and who cannot readily accept the identity expected of him in his adoptive family and the adopted adolescent who is struggling to cope in a family beset by marital conflict or mental illness.
Cultural fables may have a destructive aspect on the adopted adolescents development. One such fable is "the chosen child". This is often a source of great anger to the child whose experience of his family has not been "good enough". His anger is directed at the adoptive parents because these people "chose him".
Another fable is that of "the poor child whose parents did not want him" and who was adopted by the bountiful parents to whom the child should be ever more grateful.

Silverman. M.A. 1985. Discusses in his paper that when adoptive status is foisted upon a child, the child is encumbered with so many problems that he or she is at risk of developing a host of psychological problems. This is particularly so if the child learns of his adoption at an early age.
These can be unhappiness, separation problems, difficulty knowing and learning, aggressive fantasies and acts, preoccupation with knives and other weapons, and his feelings of being deprived and robbed.
Adoptive status tends to affect multiple aspects of the developing personality. It interferes with the childs sense of security, the modulation of and channelling of the childs aggression, the development and resolution of the Oedipus complex, super-ego formation, and identity formation.
To lose a parent early in life, especially when there is a felt element of cruel rejection and desertion, as there tends to be when a child is told of adoption while still in the throes of "sadistic-anal" ambivalence and the hostile-dependent struggles of the reproachment crisis of separation-individuation, mobilizes in tense fear and rage. The rage at the abandoning parents is in part directed toward the adoptive parents.
In part the rage is turned back on the self, contributing to the fantasy that the child was abandoned by the original parents because he or she was bad, troublesome, greedy, and destructive.
Silverman goes on to say "nearly every adopted child or adult I have treated sooner or later has revealed the fantasy that the reason for the adoption was the biological mother died in childbirth, which tends to be depicted as a tearing, ripping, bloody, murderous affair in which the baby gains life by taking the life of the mother".
The adopted child not only needs to learn about pregnancy and childbirth to solve the mysteries of his or her origins, but also needs to find out if he or she is really a murderer! Adopted children often entertain the fantasy that the original father too has died.

Wilson. : Green. : Soth. : 1986. Report that many adopted adolescent patients in their hospital (10 out of 21) have received a diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder. This diagnosis, made official in the American Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (3rd edition 1980), includes the following symptoms: impulsivity or unpredictability in areas that are potentially self damaging, a pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships with idealization, devaluation and manipulation, inappropriate intense anger.
Identity disturbance was manifested by uncertainty about several issues relating to identity, intolerence of being alone, affective instability, physically self damaging acts, and chronic feelings of boredom and emptyness. It is theorised that this disorder arose because of deficits in early parenting experiences which did not enable the child to develop a core identity, so they didnt feel part of a fused dyad, which explains their fear of abandonment and intolerence of being alone.

Kirshner.D. Nagel.L. 1988.
Is there a distinct pattern of presenting behaviours and symptoms among adopted children and adolescents referred for psychotherapy? Some clinicians and clinical researchers whose day to day observations strongly suggest that such a pattern does, in fact exist. The senior author has observed extreme provocative, aggressive, antisocial, and delinquent conduct much more consistently among adoptees than their non-adopted counterparts.
Behind the recurrent behavioural and personality patterns there have emerged emotional and psychodynamic issues specifically linked to adoption.
Schecter, Carlson, Simmons, & Work (1964) looked at adopted and non-adopted children in a psychiatric setting and found a much greater occurrence of overt destructive acts and sexual acting-out among adoptees. Menlove (1965) used a similar sample and found significantly more aggressive symptomatology among adoptees. Although several predicted differences were significant, adoptees had significantly more hyperactivity, hostility, and negativism, and significantly more of them had passive-aggressive personalities.
What then is the adopted child syndrome? On the behaviourial level, it it is an antisocial pattern that usually includes pathological lying, stealing, and manipulativeness. Fire setting is sometimes seen and promiscuous behaviour is common.
Typically, the child seeks out delinquent, antisocial children or adults often of a lower economic class than the adoptive family. Provocative, disruptive behaviour is directed toward authority figures, notably teachers and parents. The child often threatens to run away, and in many cases repeatedly does so.
Truancy is common, as well as academic under-achievement and, in many cases there are significant learning problems. There is a typically shallow quality to the attachment formed by the child, and a general lack of meaningful relationships. The child reports feeling "different" and "empty".
Yet the parents of most children with the Adopted Child Syndrome exhibit a pattern of tension and denial surrounding the issue of adoption. It soon becomes apparent however, that communication about adoption is not simply absent; much worse, the parents are tacitly communicating a message that the topic is dangerous and taboo.
The child, sensing his parents' insecurity and anxiety, is left to imagine what terrible truths they might be hiding. He feels an ominous pressure against voicing his feelings and curiosity. He senses that his adoptive parents would feel his interest in his birth parents was disloyal. He not only experiences a dread of the truth but also the stifling of his normal c